Filipino humor

This is a re-post :) Thank you CDC for posting this. :) Gave me a good laugh after a very hectic coverage for EDSA 1 22nd anniversary!

 

10 To: Jamby
From: Pia Cayetano

Roses are red
Violets are blue
I bet you enjoy "flowers"
More than Neri & John O do

9 To: Jose De Venecia
From: Your former allies in Congress

With heavy hearts we made it happen
The Speakership was declared open
The hell we care if we're a bunch of dork
Between him and GMA?!
Our choice is… pork!

8 To: Joey DV III
From: Joe DV Jr.

You made Daddy so proud
When you stood up for truth
So just keep doin' what is right
And stay away from jutes!

7 To: President Arroyo
From: Noli De Castro

My Valentine's Day wish for you madam:
Two more productive years in Malacañang
I think we're headed in the right direction
So why the need for a snap election?

6 To: Jun Lozada
From: Ben Abalos

Roses are red
Golf courses are green
If you go near Wack Wack
Patay ka sa akin!

5 To: Romy Neri
From: Jun Lozada

Forgive me oh dear friend if I testified
Believe me, I'm so afraid that's why I cried
But no matter what, even if I've died
You'll always be a part of my short, so-called life. (Awwr!)

4 To: Joker
From: Jun Lozada

You pictured me as if
I'm the god of strife
You seem to know me well
but do you know your wife?

3 To: Jun Lozada
From: Mike Defensor

In my dreams, you were blue and you were so alone
So I opted to cheer you up by planning a presscon
But woe is me! I'm baffled you sided with the nuns
In spite of my best efforts, despite the 50 grand!

2 To: Jun Lozada
From: Miriam

How do I loathe thee?
Let me count the goats.

And the number 1 Valentine's Day message…

To: Mike
From: Gloria

This Valentine's Day I got a special gift
It is from Powerbooks' bestsellers list
Together on V-Day, we'll stay home and just read
This new book that's titled: "How To Moderate Your Greed"