Eight days since I got this awful illness and after two painful therapy sessions, a major improvement has yet to be seen.
I'm trying to be very patient and relaxed about this but I can't help but get jittery. Ironically, I must avoid stress (anger management, anyone?) but the whole thing is just too stressful, not to mention painful, for me.
Bell's really gave me the blow not just physically but psychologically and emotionally. Do you know how it feels to look in the mirror and see that something is wrong? No, I refuse to call this vanity. But it's really a heartbreak. :( I can't even go out because people keep on staring when they realize half of my face is not moving. Bell's literally and figuratively took my smiles away. :(
A lot of people have been very kind and understanding about this (thanks everyone) but at the end of the day, the disease is still there and you can only hope it will be gone by daylight. And did I mention Bell's palsy afflicts 1 out of 5,000 people??
I miss work, I miss laughing, I miss eating without having to worry about dropping the food. I miss myself.
I've visited various sites about Bell's palsy (thanks google) and I figured it was caused by stress, flu or the herpes simplex virus, which I had when I was in highschool. There were encouraging stories: some recovered after 12 days, some in a month *even without therapy, but some suffered for years! Some tried acupuncture and got well, some had b12 shots (I might try this soon).
I will get my EMG results tomorrow and they will tell me how great my chances for recovery are. I will also have my third therapy and I will endure the pain (imagine the feeling of having bruises and yet they will still massage your face) because I want to get better!!!
I WILL GET BETTER!!! AND I WILL DO IT BEFORE THE FOURTH WEEK OF JULY!!!
(Ok, writing is therapeutic.)
Dear, dear Thea. It broke my heart to read this post :( I can only offer you a hug from myself and Anton *HUGS* Btw, we're praying for your speedy recovery. Hang in there.
ReplyDeleteawww sorry nandamay pa ata ako ng depression :( nakakainis lang kasi the doctors cant pinpoint what to do. :( dont worry mommy may, happy naman ako about the magazine and anton's future cover career :)
ReplyDeleteyou've been to two, come one, there's still four. you'll get through! well I guess we both know somebody who has gotten over it. so, just get well, maganda ka parin! =)
ReplyDeletesana nga sweetie. :) hay. thanks thanks :)
ReplyDeletetama yan! set a goal. be positive:)
ReplyDeleteyou have a good heart my dear! I'm sure the universe will conspire, you'd be well by the third and a half of july. that's the spirit girl!
ReplyDeletehi thea. i have a high school friend who had the same illness. she felt the same way too and recovered after a couple of months. she's now well and as if nothing happened. you'll be like her too, you'll be ok soon! i know it's easier said than done, stop worrying. continue to attract positive vibes! hope you get well soon!
ReplyDeleteHang in there, Thea. Stay positive. I'll be praying for your recovery too. Miss you. *hug!*
ReplyDeleteyou will get well. you have to believe that so it will happen. =)
ReplyDeleteHaving a disease is difficult thea.. but don't get discouraged because you can physically see how it affects you.. When I was six, I was operated in the spinal cord.
ReplyDeleteSince then, I have been walking with a limp.
Did I let that bother me?
Nope. I still did the things I wanted to do and even if people doubted my skills. As a matter of fact, I never cared about them.
I have never walked straight for the past 19 years. Half of my body was paralyzed and up to this day remain functionless.
What do I do? I find the courage to fight and go on with the help of my family and Lia. Swerte ka rin andiyan si Nixlove mo who is very supportive.
I know you are strong Thea, kaya nga tayo mga journalist.
Take it from me, lahat ng sakit gagaling din tayo.
At this time, people do not need to see your smiles, they just want to see you strong.
Go go go my friend!!!!
thea..we miss you too..but for us, ur full recovery is the best thing..
ReplyDeletei agree with capinopaolo, "At this time, people do not need to see your smiles, they just want to see you strong"..BE TOUGH GURL..
just keep this in mind, a friend told me this before: everything changes.....TOMORROW MIGHT BE DIFFERENT =)
always smile ;-) love u thea *mwahugz*
go lang ate thea! :) kayang kaya yan! :D
ReplyDeletego go thea!!! :) stay positive! ^___^
ReplyDeleteDon't force the movements pala. You can try moving your face, but not too much. Kase your unaffected muscles will try to "cover" for your affected muscles. Pag nasanay sila, they'll stay that way even after you've recovered. Also, I understand your heartbreak. I became extremely antisocial for several months. I missed a lot of events and gatherings. :( Stick to your therapy and stay positive. :)
ReplyDeletehi thea.....sorry to hear you're under treatment now.....pagaling ka ha?
ReplyDeletei'll pray for you .. Ü hope you'll be ok soon...
ReplyDeletejust keep on praying, everything will be fine lil sizzz...miss ka na namin sobra...pati mga fish dito press office...ingat and wish you well very soon!!!
ReplyDeletehi thea... ill pray for you... dont stress yourself more.. just take this time to relax... ;p i know youll be okay soon!!!;p
ReplyDeleteAwwww... Nalungkot naman ako sa post mo, especially remembering your always-ready ear-to-ear smile sa pics naten... :(( But hang in there,Thea. God put that beautiful smile on your face and he will bring it back. Meanwhile, keep smiling with your eyes and your heart, and for sure it will show through :-)
ReplyDeletekaya mo yan ate thea!^^
ReplyDeleteill include your recovery in my prayers^^
isipin mo na lang, parang isang issue lang yan ng [P]... na parang hindi matapos tapos pero in the end, nairelease naman natin... ehehe^^
sabi nga nila there's always a right time for everything... God always has a reason sa lahat ng mga bagay na ginagawa nia... stay in God's loving hand and everything will be better^^
miss yah!^^
keep up the spirit! ipinagdarasal kita! love duday
ReplyDeletehi Thea! Sorry to hear that you are having a hard time with Bell right now. Alam mo ba, our brod PJ also had that disease just last year and he has completely recovered naman. So, no need to get stressed even more kasi Bell's palsy is totally curable. Keep your heart smiling na lang always. There are plenty of people who loves you much-that includes me. Ok? Get well soon sis.. hugs! (^_^)
ReplyDelete